The 10 Most Valuable Footballers on the Planet

These players are not valuable as in their team could never cope without them this coming season—like Dulwich Hamlet's Chris Dickson in 2006—but valuable as in how much they're worth on the transfer market. Dickson brought in a steep £35,000!

Paolo Maldini fans, Il Capitano didn't make the list, but his grandkids were given strong consideration.

10) Chelsea's Michael Essien—Chelsea made Essien the most expensive African footballer ever when they purchased him from Lyon for £24 million in 2005. He has only enhanced his reputation in his time at Stamford Bridge.

He's one of the most versatile players in the world, tough like Gattuso, and steadily developing his surprisingly impressive offensive skill-set. There isn't a side in the world that he wouldn't start for.

Value: £35 million

9) Arsenal's Cesc Fabregas—Cesc is soft, petulant, annoying, and pretty boring to watch; that's why he doesn't get a fancy YouTube video embedded in his name.

But he's also one of the best passers in the world. I was surprised to see that he scored seven Premier League goals last season. Eugh, I have nothing else to say here.

Value: £35 million

8) Bayern Munich's Franck Ribéry—Super Franck (can I do that?) has enjoyed a mercurial rise since World Cup 2006.

Zidane comparisons are hyperbolic, but Ribéry's game speaks for itself. If he played for a top English or Spanish side, he'd be a world superstar.

Value: £38 million

7) Manchester United's Wayne Rooney—It seems unfair to call a 22-year-old with 43 English caps and 195 Premier League appearances a disappointment, but Rooney has yet to add the clinical finishing that would make him unstoppable to his repertoire.

And he's yet to reign in his temper. And he definitely has the frame to add 20 pounds, the bad kind.

Despite those shortcomings, his tantalizing potential still shines through regularly. His work rate is remarkable for an offensive player, and he's capable of making goals that few in the world would venture to attempt.

Value: £40 million

6) Liverpool's Fernando Torres—A case could be made that he should be a few spots higher on this list, but the fact that he tattooed his name in J.R.R. Tolkien's Tengwar script on his forearm weighed heavily against him.

Yes, he's a proven goalscorer, Euro 2008 champion, and has lovely hair, but Tengwar?

Value: £45 million

5) Real Madrid's Sergio Ramos—There's definitely something going on between Torres and Ramos. Don't you sense it? Nothing wrong that, it's cool, whatever. Two less guys I gotta compete with.

What isn't cool is Torres's Tengwar tattoo. That's why Ramos is ranked ahead of him.

Value: £45 million

4) Atletico Madrid's Sergio Aguero—La Liga's best player in 2007-08 while just 19 years old, El Kun led Atletico's Champions League qualification run, their first since 2001-02.

How he fares in the Champions League and how he holds up physically are the only questions left to be answered by Aguero.

Value: £50 million

3) Barcelona's Lionel Messi—It's hard to believe Messi just turned 21 on June 24. It's also hard to believe his tiny legs can move so quickly.

When he's on his game, no number of opposing players can keep him from scoring. Injuries and inconsistency seem to stymie him all too often.

Value: £55 million

2) AC Milan's Kaká—Behind the angelic baby face and devotional undershirts lies the holy grail of modern midfielders. Kaká blends track speed, surprising power, and ridiculous skill.

He's consistently productive for both club and country, a rare scandal-free star, and still just 26 years old.

Value: £60 million

1) (Real Madrid via) Manchester United's Cristiano Ronaldo—The best player in the world (right now), Ronaldo is a master dribbler, shooter, and diver.

In 2007-08, he scored 42 goals in 48 games in leading Manchester United to a Premier League and Champions League double.

Before stumping up the list price for Ronaldo, Madrid should remember that two years ago Ronaldinho would've been atop this list at £100 million. Of course, Ronaldinho never outran a Bugatti. My bad.

As long as he keeps the trash talking, winks, and penalty kicking to a minimum, he may just be worth the investment.

Value: £70 million

Just falling short (hehe): Jean Carlos Chera—At age nine, the 4'6" wunderkind next-Pele, next-Maradona, next-Ronaldinho, next-Freddy Adu became an overnight Internet sensation.

Videos of him popping the keeper (who couldn't reach the crossbar jumping), dribbling through players as if they hadn't fully developed their leg muscles yet, and celebrating each of his 10 goals a game like they were World Cup game-winners flooded YouTube.

At the time, it was purported that Chera was the best U-14 player in all of Brazil. Santos may have mined a metaphorical golden talent. But probably not.

Also considered: Iker Casillas, Petr Cech, Steven Gerrard, Micah Richards, Robinho, Wesley Sneijder, Ricardo Quaresma, David Villa